Wednesday, January 14, 2009

 

Dear World:

We, the United States of America, your top quality supplier of the ideals of liberty and democracy, would like to apologize for our 2001-2008 interruption in service. The technical fault that led to this eight-year service outage has been located, and the software responsible was replaced November 4. Early tests of the newly installed program indicate that we are now operating correctly, and we expect it to be fully functional on January 20, 2009. We apologize for any inconvenience caused by the outage. We look forward to resuming full service and hope to improve in years to come. We thank you for your patience and understanding,

Sincerely,
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA


Thanks, Skip, for the Dear World message text!

*******

This meme comes from Gossamer Tapestry, Doug Taron’s blog. The various accomplishments or experiences are fixed (who comes up with these things?). I’ve put the ones I’ve done into bold type.

1.
Started my own blog
2.
Slept under the stars While white water rafting on the Rio Grande.
3.
Played in a band Not a rock band but a percussion ensemble backing up the chorus in the play Seven Against Thebes by Aeschylus.
4.
Visited Hawaii
5.
Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity


7.
Been to Disneyland/world Disneyland with my daughters, many years ago
8.
Climbed a mountain This is marginal, it was very small, but it was a certifiable Alp
9.
Held a praying mantis she was very good about it, all things considered
10.
Sung a solo As the Learned Judge in G&S's Trial By Jury which I also directed
11. Bungee jumped
12.
Visited Paris
13.
Watched lightning at sea
14.
Taught myself an art from scratch Stained glass, among others
15.
Adopted a child My two magnificent daughters
16.
Had food poisoning NOT recommended
17.
Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18.
Grown my own vegetables
19.
Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20.
Slept on an overnight train TRIED to sleep on an overnight train
21.
Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24.
Built a snow fort
25.
Held a lamb
26.
Gone skinny dipping At every possible opportunity
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29.
Seen a total eclipse
30.
Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32.
Been on a cruise And also cruised :-)
33.
Seen Niagara Falls in person And gone on the Maid of the Mist, and to the Cave of the Winds
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35.
Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37.
Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David No, but I did see his Pieta
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt No, but the geysers in Iceland
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44.
Visited Africa North--Arab--Africa
45.
Walked on a beach by moonlight
46.
Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49.
Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51.
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling Snorkeling off St. John, American Virgin Islands
52.
Kissed in the rain
53.
Played in the mud
54.
Gone to a drive-in theater
55.
Been in a movie in the background of a scene in a small movie I had designed
56.
Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59.
Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62.
Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64.
Donated blood, platelets or plasma As a very young man but they don't want my blood any more for reasons that should be obvious
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69.
Saved a favorite childhood toy My teddy bear
70.
Visited the Lincoln Memorial Very impressive
71.
Eaten caviar Overrated


72.
Pieced a quilt see above
73.
Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London No, but was sta
nding right outside the Palace in 1970 when the Queen went off in the big glass coach to open Parliament
77.
Broken a bone Two bones, also NOT recommended
78.
Been on a speeding motorcycle Again marginal--a Vespa at full throttle
79.
Seen the Grand Canyon in person And went down into it on the mules
80. Published a book No, but I have illustrated one book and a training manual
81.
Visited the Vatican and climbed the dome of St. Peter's to the very top
82.
Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86.
Visited the White House
87.
Killed and prepared an animal for eating flounder and its bigger cousin, fluke
88.
Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life found her incoherent and desperately ill with alcohol poisoning and got her into detox, later shepherding her through rehab and AA
90.
Sat on a jury
91.
Met someone famous and actually had a conversation: Carol Burnett and Shirley Maclaine
92.
Joined a book club
93.
Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95.
Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97.
Been involved in a law suit
98.
Owned a cell phone
99.
Been stung by a bee A swarm of ground hornets--MAJORLY not recommended--I went over their nest with a lawn mower
100.
Ridden an elephant

That's 63 out of 100--quite tolerable, and I hope to add a couple more before the end, although hopefully nothing else that involves hostile insects.

I think one of us should come up with a completely scabrous gay accomplishments meme. The possibilities boggle the mind! Ted? C. Scott? Anybody?

Comments:
Very nice list. I also wondered who comes up with these things. There's a fair bit of overlap on our lists, and also some interesting differences.
 
Are your daughters as adorable as grown women? We agree on 64, amongst many others...
 
Actually, Sam, they are--no bias on my part, of course! :-)

One's an environmentalist, the other is climbing the corporate ladder steadily and quite successfully, but is still a nice, genuine person. Adopting and raising them was the great, central event in my life.
 
If I come up with it, do you promise to answer it?
 
Yes, Ted. Even if I turn out to be embarrassingly vanilla.
 
You have done so much in your life buddy. I hope I get to do at least half those things. The photo of you and your two daughters is beautiful.
 
I have managed a few on the list, but I very much disagree with you on caviar. That and this list reminds me of how much I miss riding motorcycles.
 
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?